H. L. Mencken
“Democracy is the art and science of running the circus from the monkey cage.”
invites fetish club over
A man invites some of his fetish club over for breakfast…. They are catching up…
Andy Warhol
“I am a deeply superficial person.”
Charles Kettering
“Thinking is one thing no one has ever been able to tax.”
Calvin Trillin
“As far as I’m concerned, ‘whom’ is a word that was invented to make everyone…
Zsa Zsa Gabor
“I am a marvelous housekeeper. Every time I leave a man I keep his house.”
Yogi Berra
“A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore.”
Kevin James
“Thanksgiving, man. Not a good day to be my pants.”
Irv Kupcinet
“An optimist is a person who starts a new diet on Thanksgiving Day.”
Clint Eastwood
“If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.”
Joan Collins
“The problem with beauty is that it’s like being born rich and getting poorer.”
Thor Heyerdahl
“Progress is man’s ability to complicate simplicity.”
Is “Anting” Just For Birds? This Butt-Naked Man Disagrees
A bizarre photo has been making the rounds on social media: a butt-naked guy lying…
Jim Davis
“Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin…
Laurence J. Peter
“Expert: a man who makes three correct guesses consecutively.”
Earl Wilson
“Success is simply a matter of luck. Ask any failure.”
P. J. O’Rourke
“Never fight an inanimate object.”
Bride Upset After Guest Orders 20 Pizza to Vegan Wedding Reception
A bride was devastated and furious at her family after a guest ordered pizza to…
Thought they met before
A man and a woman meet in a bar and the man cannot shake the…
Rita Rudner
“I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.”
Mignon McLaughlin
“There are a handful of people whom money won’t spoil, and we all count ourselves…
Logan Pearsall Smith
“People say that life is the thing, but I prefer reading.”
Phyllis Diller
“Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.”
Recording a conversation that will cheer you up: the funniest moments
There’s something uniquely uplifting about capturing funny moments in conversation – moments that bring joy,…
Franklin P. Jones
“Scratch a dog and you’ll find a permanent job.”
Granny Gets Plugged and Lights Up!
Meet the Internet’s Favorite Grandma: Pauline “Granny” Kana If you haven’t heard of Pauline “Granny”…
Why Every Friend Group Needs a “Video Cutter” For Funny Videos
Every friend group has that person—the one blessed with the mystical powers of the video cutter tool.…
Mae West
“Too much of a good thing can be taxing.”
Bob Hope
“A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that…
Sylvia Plath
“There must be quite a few things that a hot bath won’t cure, but I…