Lana Turner
“A successful man is one who makes more money than his wife can spend. A…
Phil McGraw
“A year from now, you’re gonna weigh more or less than what you do right…
Bob Dole
“The internet is a great way to get on the net.”
Jerome K. Jerome
“What I am looking for is a blessing not in disguise.”
Wernher von Braun
“Research is what I’m doing when I don’t know what I’m doing.”
Why Dad Jokes Are Still Winning the Internet
Dad jokes are simple, predictable, and proudly ridiculous, which is exactly why people keep sharing…
Rita Rudner
“When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was…
Gilda Radner
“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch.”
Herbert Hoover
“All men are equal before fish.”
Robert A. Heinlein
“Never underestimate the power of human stupidity.”
Yogi Berra
“Nobody goes there anymore. It’s too crowded.”
George Burns
“Happiness is having a large, loving, caring, close-knit family in another city.”
Steven Wright
“A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I’m afraid of widths.”
Ogden Nash
“The trouble with a kitten is that eventually it becomes a cat.”
Bill Vaughan
“Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age…
Joseph Addison
“Even a stopped clock is right twice a day.”
Victor Borge
“Santa Claus has the right idea – visit people only once a year.”
J. Paul Getty
“The meek shall inherit the Earth, but not its mineral rights.”
Henny Youngman
“When I told my doctor I couldn’t afford an operation, he offered to touch-up my…
George Carlin
“May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.”
F. Scott Fitzgerald
“First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes…
Ted Turner
“Sports is like a war without the killing.”
Eddie Izzard
“Never put a sock in a toaster.”
Clint Eastwood
“If you want a guarantee, buy a toaster.”
Jay Leno
“The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be…
Alfred Adler
“The only normal people are the ones you don’t know very well.”
The Most Played Song of the 1990s on Radio Might Surprise You
A 90s hit that defined radio airplay When people think of 1990s music, they often…
Gilbert K. Chesterton
“The poets have been mysteriously silent on the subject of cheese.”
Charles M. Schulz
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in…
Emma Goldman
“If voting changed anything, they’d make it illegal.”