Emo Philips
“I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.”
Meet Helix: The Husky Who Plays the Piano and Sings!
In the quiet town of Palmer, Alaska, lives a dog unlike any other. His name…
F. Scott Fitzgerald
“Nothing is as obnoxious as other people’s luck.”
Sophia Loren
“Spaghetti can be eaten most successfully if you inhale it like a vacuum cleaner.”
Jean-Luc Godard
“To be or not to be. That’s not really a question.”
Married couple
A married couple are sitting in bed looking at their phones when the husband stumbles…
Gilda Radner
“I base most of my fashion taste on what doesn’t itch.”
Inventor of the Harley
The inventor of the Harley-Davidson motorcycle, Arthur Davidson, died and went to heaven. At the…
Niels Bohr
“Prediction is very difficult, especially if it’s about the future.”
Princess Margaret
“I have as much privacy as a goldfish in a bowl.”
When 2 Toilets Fight Each Other
We never thought we’d find ourselves riveted by a video of two toilets swinging on…
Joan Crawford
“I, Joan Crawford, I believe in the dollar. Everything I earn, I spend.”
Elizabeth Taylor
“Big girls need big diamonds.”
Ted Turner
“Sports is like a war without the killing.”
Jimmy Buffett
“Indecision may or may not be my problem.”
Jay Leno
“The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be…
Mort Sahl
“My life needs editing.”
The Insurance Game
Three elderly men were relaxing on the beach in Florida. One said “I owned a…
Lady Spends All Her Money On Ninja Turtle Merchandise
Flashback to 2011: 26-year-old Michele Ivey wasn’t just a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles fan—she was…
A monk in a shower
A monk was about to take a shower and realized he’d forgotten to bring his…
John F. Kennedy
“The pay is good and I can walk to work.”
Truman Capote
“Venice is like eating an entire box of chocolate liqueurs in one go.”
A human couple meets an alien couple
They decide it would be fun to swap partners for the night. The alien woman…
Mary Pickford
“Adding sound to movies would be like putting lipstick on the Venus de Milo.”
Clarence Darrow
“When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I’m beginning…
Elderly Lady Knits Fence
Anne Eunson, a talented knitter from Hamnavoe, is known for her creative and unconventional approach…
Mae West
“Between two evils, I always pick the one I never tried before.”
Warren Buffett
“I buy expensive suits. They just look cheap on me.”
Bill Vaughan
“Youth is when you’re allowed to stay up late on New Year’s Eve. Middle age…
Charles M. Schulz
“Don’t worry about the world coming to an end today. It is already tomorrow in…